In all the posts I’ve read about ‘better blogging’ they tell you that you must ask yourself what the goal with your blog is, and that it must have content. I’ve talked about the goal part before … deep down I think I want to re-create what we had in Yahoo 360 … a sense of community, and bunch of online buddies communicating. Now, in hindsight, that seems to be really unique, what happened there, and Yahoo will never know what they missed by shutting it down.
I understand that people seem to be obsessing over blog traffic and statistics, but I don’t get it … what fun is traffic if they don’t say anything? In the other place, while I had the self-hosted wordpress, I had this gadget where you could see where the visitors came from — I don’t have that now, I have the flag counter instead… but I kept looking at that thing and found it very intriguing. They came from all corners of the world, never said a word, and I kept wondering what they thought and how they ended up at my page.
This isn’t just about goals for blogging. A friend of mine … here in Saint John, has a great blog and there she has posted a 101 list … 101 things she wants to do in 1001 days. I don’t have anything like that … I have one thing though: I want to see NYC before I die. That’s not totally out of reach. In a future post, I’ll explain the URL for this blog … i95ride.wordpress, that’s also something that I could have put on my list.
If I’d had a list like that earlier in life, I would have put in something that had to do with self-esteem. Used to have some issues with that and twelve years ago, or so, I doubt I would have had a blog like this online. It took a long time, and a lot of pondering and self-doubt before I even showed my newly won, online buddies a picture of myself. I used to feel that everyone was so much better/smarter than I. There were times when I was really down in the drains …when I could walk in to, for example, a convenience store … some young girl working there, and I would think: ‘I could never be able do a job like that!’ This was until I came to some kind of insight that I’m not better than anyone else, but I’m not any worse either, and I can do anything if I really want to. And more importantly: «You can’t please them all!» It’s still very fragile, though … and there are still times when I have to remind myself of those statements.
Now I sense that I’m getting closer to that thin, red line for how personal I want this to be. I could easily write two thousand words about this and bore people to death, but McDuff is sitting here with a demanding look on his face … wanting me to get off the couch. This is where I found him yesterday and he didn’t even look up at me 🙂
colderweather2011 
Thank you for this wonderful post. I agree with you that we are each as important–but not more so–than each other person we encounter. It took many years for me to realize that fact. I think that all of life is about growing, maturing, learning, changing, and so many of our painful times or reticent moments in life are the experiences that teach us if we allow. As to goals, they are great as long as they don’t become dictatorial over our lives. I’ve learned to slow down a little, that making straight “A’s” is the wrong goal for me (I’m in grad school), and that communing with people and with nature is possibly the most life-enhancing thing I can do, for them and for me. As to how many hits on a blog? I am with you. Who are they? Where are they from? What are their stories? Thankfully some folks do stop, read, comment and eventually we become “blogging buddies” and that is nice. So, “blogging buddy,” may you have a truly magnificent day!
Cecelia
Cecelia, It took me quite a few years to come that … insight, too..We grow … mature … and eventually/hopefully become more comfortable in our own skins, so to speak. I look back, sometimes, at choices I made in my 20’s and considered myself pretty much being an adult … how immature they were. We live and learn.
We each have our journey, don’t we? And our story to tell. I believe, always have, that we learn best from one another’s stories. thank you for sharing, always. Hey, MacDuff has the right idea for a grey rainy day!
walk in beauty.
Joss, Yes, we all have our stories. I think of that sometimes when I see large gatherings of people … ‘they all have a story’. Some of us want to tell their story and others are more inclined to clam up.
I so agree about Yahoo. They really lost something great!!
I have major issues with self-esteem. I try to overcome them but they persist. Better than I used to be though.
Love the McDuff photo!!! Would like to be like that now!
Julie-Ann, I can’t say that I’ve fully overcome them either, even though I’ve come a long way. I have certain hang-ups that still haunt me, and I must often remind myself of that ‘I’m no better or worse than anyone else’ … like a mantra.
Rebekah, You use the phrase, to become more comfortable in our own skins, so to speak.
The French phrase of commendation, Elle est bien dans sa peau, she is comfortable in her skin, has always struck a deep deep chord with me. I think somehow French people are bred and/or brought up to be that way, to have that outlook, that self-confidence that they are who they are, and that they are sufficient. I envy that very much, because I certainly did not grow up and live my life that way.
Perhaps you know the French phrase and that’s why you used the English expression —
If not, then here’s another example of all the references from so many different sources circling around a theme —
like perfection , on my blog.
Judith, I don’t speak French at all … in spite of the five years I lived in Quebec. That phrase, I’ve probably picked up from somebody else some time … didn’t think much of it when I typed it, but I do now. I’ve made a point of picking up expressions in English — that makes it easier for me, and after seven years here, I sometimes forget that I speak my second language. I had exactly the same impression when I lived in QC… it’s really different. Especially for me, coming from Sweden, where saying something good about yourself is highly frowned upon. There, you’re supposed to keep a low profile and not stand out from the crowd in any way. If you do that, people might think that you think that you ARE someone (!) This whole mentality made it very difficult when they were being interviewed for a job. Quite often nowadays, you’re supposed to tell how good you are … and this is turning into a blog of its own … I must stop 🙂
Maybe this is how I leave the link?
http://touch2touch.wordpress.com/2011/05/08/proverbs-and-other-anonymous-authors/
Judith
I read it and commented, but I think I was logged in with another account because the comment is ‘awaiting moderation’…
I’m in one of those times when life is hectic and something’s got to give, and in this case it’s been blogging —
I’ve been slow getting to read posts from bloggers I follow, like you, and slow in moderating comments —
Your comment is there now, and thank you very much. I think I’ll take a leaf from Stef’s blog (Smile, Kiddo) and do so now (smile, that is), maybe it will rub off 😉
Something’s got to give, but in my case …this is something I enjoy and have fun with … it’s rarely web stuff that gives.
Hope it did … rub off 🙂
Hi Rebekah,
Thanks for this post. Shall I write about writing, reading, educating, sharing, volunteering, my family, my travels … so many thing and nothing at all. If I had to pick one, I would focus on writing on books and education. Once we have a focus it all falls into place.
Excellent post and thanks for sharing!